Needle in a Haystack

Five actually. I’m looking for five needles. I’m comparing numbers in two different databases to see why the totals are different. Think of it like balancing your checkbook. People still do that, right? You compare the dollar amounts in your checkbook ledger to the dollar amounts on your bank statement. Now…imagine that process with nearly 1,000 transactions. Same process, only it’s going to take you a bit longer.

Keep in mind that several of the numbers could be in the red. I don’t know about you, but I don’t like negative balances in my check ledger. But in this case, it’s okay. So, the possible list of values just doubled.

Also, one of the databases rounds everything to the nearest thousand; the other doesn’t. So often times, there’s no sure way of knowing if they’re truly the same or not. Because of these rounding peculiarities, sometimes the numbers are off…by a thousand or two! My grand total is off. So, I checked the sub-totals. Five of the seven of them are off. And God only knows how many individual records are causing the problem. So, I’m checking them all.

I have found one needle. And it was a big one. $1.4M. Makes you wonder how something that big can hide, doesn’t it? Nevertheless, finding it was a victory.

Looking for needles in haystacks is a somewhat tedious job. Monotonous. Mind-numbing, really. Just scrolling through two different lists of numbers, bouncing your eyes back and forth between the two columns… sometimes I forget to blink. Do you know what happens to your eyeballs when you don’t take the time to blink? They get really dry. They’re SO dry, they feel like little rocks in your head. Then blinking becomes a chore, a painful task.

On the other hand, do you know what happens to me when I choose to blink? I totally lose my place. Inevitably, the finger that was holding my place in one database shifts OR the pencil I was using as a placeholder in the other database moves. And it never ceases to amaze me how long it takes me to figure out where I left off.

But when you actually find a needle in a haystack, it’s like finding a golden ticket to Wonka World. You’re totally refreshed and all-in-excited that you can find any needle in any haystack lickity-split. You feel like a million bucks, the best needle-finder that ever there was. Bring on the haystacks, we’re finding us some needles.

But hours later with no more needles triumphs, you’re completely drained. You couldn’t find a needle in the craft section of your local Wal-Mart. You’ve never felt so useless! You can’t even remember the joy of finding that last needle and you start to wonder how important it is if these darn needles ever get found.

Such is the cycle of haystack needle hunts. And it’s exactly what I have to look forward to again tomorrow.