Okay, so it started yesterday morning. I often times check out the local paper online when I'm slow at getting started in the mornings. And that happens EVERY Monday morning. There was an article about how a couple of local banks were held up on Friday. Strangely, I hadn't heard anything about it all weekend, so I read the article. It didn't mention any names, but described the two incidents which happened just minutes apart. Well, the next article was about how they had a suspect in custody. He's a kid from our hometown, used to be in Jeff's class until he was expelled. I think he's been doing drugs for awhile, but I don't know anything for sure. I know him because I taught his 7th grade Religious Ed class. Not to mention, he and Jeff used to hang out and play basketball together.
This kid is 18 and is an only child. His parents are divorced. He has a lot of free time because his parents are busy. He's a bit spoiled and has a history of being somewhat defiant to the rules, acting like he's above them.
Sound familiar? Jeff has been/can be all of those things! Maybe not at the same time. Perhaps in varying degrees. But still, Jeff and this kid have LOTS in common...except that to my knowledge, Jeff has never gotten mixed up with drugs. (And we've drug tested him several times in the last four years. So, if he's tried drugs, he hasn't done them consistently enough to get caught.)
Anyway, all day yesterday, I just kept thinking about this kid and his parents and how Jeff and I were SO CLOSE to being in that exact same place. How one-too-many inconsistent or outright bad parenting decisions on my part could have pushed him the wrong direction. Or one day when I was too busy or too tired to notice Jeff pushing the barriers of out-of-control and I did nothing. And regularly prioritizing something else above my responsibility to Jeff.
If this kid's parents are to blame for his current situation, I am at least as guilty...of neglect or bad parenting or lack of common sense.
And don't get me wrong, I know that this kid is equally (if not more so) at fault for his current situation. Ignoring the rules and the laws, choosing to do drugs, putting his own selfish interests above those of others, not considering the ramifications of his actions, etc., etc., etc.
But still, it just cut too close for me. We are lucky...no, BLESSED that things didn't swing the other way for Jeff. I guess it just hit me...HARD...that one tiny thing could have made the difference between having a kid that enrolls in college and a kid that goes to jail. And honestly, I'm pulled between overwhelming relief and absolute guilt.
Thank you, Lord for EVERYTHING You do in my life. And thank you to all my friends and family who have prayed for me and for Jeff. Please pray for ALL teenagers and their families, especially this kid and his family having such a difficult time this week.
This kid is 18 and is an only child. His parents are divorced. He has a lot of free time because his parents are busy. He's a bit spoiled and has a history of being somewhat defiant to the rules, acting like he's above them.
Sound familiar? Jeff has been/can be all of those things! Maybe not at the same time. Perhaps in varying degrees. But still, Jeff and this kid have LOTS in common...except that to my knowledge, Jeff has never gotten mixed up with drugs. (And we've drug tested him several times in the last four years. So, if he's tried drugs, he hasn't done them consistently enough to get caught.)
Anyway, all day yesterday, I just kept thinking about this kid and his parents and how Jeff and I were SO CLOSE to being in that exact same place. How one-too-many inconsistent or outright bad parenting decisions on my part could have pushed him the wrong direction. Or one day when I was too busy or too tired to notice Jeff pushing the barriers of out-of-control and I did nothing. And regularly prioritizing something else above my responsibility to Jeff.
If this kid's parents are to blame for his current situation, I am at least as guilty...of neglect or bad parenting or lack of common sense.
And don't get me wrong, I know that this kid is equally (if not more so) at fault for his current situation. Ignoring the rules and the laws, choosing to do drugs, putting his own selfish interests above those of others, not considering the ramifications of his actions, etc., etc., etc.
But still, it just cut too close for me. We are lucky...no, BLESSED that things didn't swing the other way for Jeff. I guess it just hit me...HARD...that one tiny thing could have made the difference between having a kid that enrolls in college and a kid that goes to jail. And honestly, I'm pulled between overwhelming relief and absolute guilt.
Thank you, Lord for EVERYTHING You do in my life. And thank you to all my friends and family who have prayed for me and for Jeff. Please pray for ALL teenagers and their families, especially this kid and his family having such a difficult time this week.
1 comment:
Amen. Raising kids today is scary!
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