Grandma's House

I spent much of the day at Grandma's house. Grandma lives in the nursing home...has for 5 1/2 years. But I call the nursing home "Grandma's house".

I got a call from my mom at 9:30 this morning, letting me know that Grandma wasn't doing well and the staff at the nursing home suggested that they call the family in. They were fairly certain that death was imminent. So, I contacted a couple of relatives that my parents didn't have numbers for (on them, anyway). Then I headed over to Grandma's house.

I got there around 10am and didn't leave until close to 8:30pm. Grandma was resting peacefully when I left. Her blood pressure is really low; her heart rate is really high. She's taking very shallow breaths, but doesn't appear to be in any pain. So, several of us just sat with her today, telling old stories and laughing and reminiscing and getting choked up. It was a good day.

But Grandma is tough...and stubborn. She's still with us. It's obvious that death is coming. But it wasn't imminent. But that's okay. In God's time. Also, one of Grandma's sons is in Italy, trying desperately to get back. No matter when she passes, the funeral will wait until Joe gets back to the States.

My dilemma is this...I'm supposed to be on travel this coming week. My flight is at 10:40am Monday, to Seattle. I'm not supposed to be home until Friday afternoon. But I missed my other grandmother's funeral because I was seven months pregnant, 1100 miles away, and active duty in the Air Force. This is my last living grandparent and I really want to be at her funeral.

So, I'm leaning towards canceling my trip. That leaves my co-worker to travel alone and deal with our customers on her own. And I have to touch base with someone at work to see about cancelling all of my travel arrangements. But I still think the right thing to do is to stay home. I wonder if my bosses will feel the same way.

But what if Grandma is still with us in a week? I could have traveled...making my company happy, my customers happy, and being there for my co-worker. Ugh! I'm so torn. What to do! I told my co-worker, the one I'm traveling with, that I'd call her tomorrow. Hopefully the situation is a little clearer by then. I just want to do the right thing by everyone. Family first, work second. But I really don't want to put my co-worker in an uncomfortable position.

God, bless all aspects of this situation...my grandma and my family, my decision about traveling, my co-worker's possible trip alone, my customers' understanding, and my company's ability to change my travel arrangements.